Posts Tagged ‘Overbuying’

When Does Enough Become Too Much?

August 18th, 2010

Too many choicesA  few years ago I entered the produce section of my newly remodeled grocery store to purchase some tomatoes, only to discover that it was going to take quite an effort to fulfill my mission. The new and “improved” produce department was at least double the size of the old one, and it took me 5 minutes of intense searching to discover where the tomatoes were located. There were dozens of tables displaying bin after bin of all types of fruits and vegetables, and I became increasingly annoyed at each bin that didn’t reveal the object of my quest. While some of you may have enjoyed such a hunt, it nearly brought me to tears – so many choices and so much floor space to navigate left me feeling overwhelmed and frustrated.

 It turns out I’m hardly alone in my reaction to having too many options – numerous studies have concluded that satisfaction level drops as people are given more choices. For example, a joint study by researchers from Columbia and Stanford Universities concluded that “people actually seemed to prefer to exercise their opportunities to choose in contexts where their choices were limited” and “they even performed better in such limited-choice contexts.” Translation: less choices lead to greater satisfaction and better performance.

So what does this have to do with organizing? I wonder if having too many possessions leads to a similar decline in satisfaction. One of the steps in the organizing process is to pare down the number of items one has so that only things that are useful or meaningful are kept. Many of my clients have an abundance of items yet resist letting any go because they are sure they will need them “someday.” For example, they may have a closet packed with clothes and be reluctant to let go of any because each one has the potential to be just the right choice for an upcoming occasion. Does having to choose which of the 11 pairs of black pants to wear, or which of the 53 pairs of shoes is just the right one, at least on some level, lessen one’s quality of life? If closets aren’t your sore spot, what about your overstuffed bookshelves, overflowing craft room, or an impassable basement?  Although they often insist otherwise, I imagine that this seemingly endless possibility of choices might actually cause people to be less satisfied than they realize.

So when does enough become too much? I’d love to hear your take on how the volume of items from which you have to choose impacts your satisfaction.

Wishing you simplicity, harmony and freedom,

Signature Sue

Neatening Isn’t Organizing

August 11th, 2010

Horrified womanI recently encountered a situation with my client, whom I’ll call “Ann”, which exemplifies how some people think neatening is the same thing as organizing, and how detrimental that can be.  Ann has several chronic medical conditions that generate lots of paperwork, leaving her buried in piles and overwhelmed. She also tends to be an over-shopper, buying things because they’re fun or pretty, not because she’ll necessarily use them, although she says she intends to give them as gifts someday. In addition, she has emotional attachments to gift boxes, greeting cards, stickers, ribbon, and other gift-giving supplies. Ann also envisions herself as being a great cook some day, so she stockpiles recipes and cooking supplies. I’ve worked with Ann on and off for several years to set up systems for her paperwork and create space for the emotion-evoking things that fill her small condo.

When we work together, Ann tells me that  she hates her cluttered home, but although her head tells her she should let go of many of the unused things that fill her space, her heart won’t let her release them. I’ve been using motivational interviewing techniques and guidance from the book Buried in Treasures to slowly help Ann release things that aren’t giving her joy. We had been making slow but steady progress until “Linda” (not her real name) entered Ann’s life.

Linda is Ann’s cleaning woman. She told Ann she could whip her place into shape in four hours. Ann, being emotionally vulnerable and helpless, agreed to have Linda work her self-described magic. Unfortunately Linda, who was great at cleaning, wasn’t so great at organizing. She embraced the same philosophy kids often use when you tell them to clean their room – getting things out of sight is the goal. Linda shoved things wherever they would fit – cooking supplies were jammed into kitchen cabinets; recipes were shoved onto shelves; excess paperwork was tossed into large lidded bins; potential gifts were placed into boxes stacked from floor to ceiling; and gift boxes were stacked to go to recycling.

When Linda excitedly showed Ann the neat-as-a-pin results of her work, Ann was horrified. She could no longer see the things she loved, find the important papers that were previously stacked on her dining room table, or easily access the few pots and pans she used regularly. Even worse, the gift boxes that meant so much to her were unceremoniously awaiting their execution in the recycling bin.

If you find yourself in a similar situation, where you just want to make things neater and better for someone (including yourself), be sure to respect their feelings and recognize that neatening and getting things out of sight isn’t the goal of organizing – making it easy to find things when you need them and being surrounded by the things you love is what matters.

Wishing you simplicity, harmony and freedom,

Signature Sue

Organizing Lessons from Toy Story 3

August 4th, 2010

Toy Story 3As I did around this time last year, I just saw a Disney-Pixar film that offers some great organizing lessons. This year it was Toy Story 3 that lured me from the comfort of my couch. The premise of the story is that Andy, who we met as a young boy in the first movie of the series, is getting ready to go to college and must decide what to do with his toys. This story tugged at my heart not only because I have son named Andy who’s in college, but also because I see many of my clients face the same struggles as Andy while they move towards creating a new, better life for themselves. Here are my observations:

The oldies but goodies are goodies for a reason. Andy had a large number of toys that he had enjoyed throughout his childhood – he didn’t seem to be constantly bringing in new toys. What oldies but goodies do you own? While they may not give you the thrill of being new or offer the excitement of finding bargain, there’s probably a good reason that you prefer these things. Whether it’s a pair of pants that fit you just right, a paring knife that makes life in the kitchen easier, or a piece of artwork you enjoy pondering, many things in our life are hard to replace – so stop trying. Don’t make impulse purchases, or even conscious purchases, if you already have something that suits your needs – you’ll end up having less clutter. 

It may be easier than you think to let go of things you don’t need. Molly, Andy’s sister, had a bedroom filled with things that were no longer meaningful to her. Until her mom prompted her, she hadn’t taken the time to pare them down. Once she got started, however, Molly had an easy time letting go of a lot of things she didn’t want or need. Her mom’s encouragement gave her the motivation she needed to move things to the donate bin or even the trash, so she could surround herself with things that were meaningful to her now. Is there someone who can encourage or help you let go of the things that no longer make your life fulfilling? If you’re a parent, can you help your kids learn to set limits by helping them evaluate their belongings?

Here’s a link to my newsletter where I offer additional observations on Toy Story 3 – I’d love to hear your thoughts. In case you missed it or want a refresher, here’s a link to my newsletter on last year’s movie, Up.

Wishing you simplicity, harmony and freedom,

Signature_Sue

Buy Needful Things

February 3rd, 2010

PAYThis week’s blog is from guest blogger Gretchen Rubin, a best-selling writer whose new book, The Happiness Project, is an account of the year she spent test-driving studies and theories about how to be happier.

“I’m an under-buyer (as opposed to an over-buyer). That means I have trouble prodding myself to buy things, even things I absolutely need, like contact-lens solution. When I do buy, I buy as little as possible (even though this means I have to buy again before long). I often procrastinate about buying essential seasonal items, like mittens, until late into the season. I use things for too long, past the point at which they’re used up or worn out. Sure, a pair of old khakis is nice, but at some point, I really do need a new toothbrush.

“As an under-buyer, I’ve developed some resolutions to help me buy, and the most important of these resolutions is ‘buy needful things.’ I force myself to stop at the drugstore to pick up the supplies I need. I prod myself to buy three tubes of toothpaste, not just one. I ask myself if we have an emergency supply of cereal and light bulbs. I ask myself, ‘Do I need this?’ and if I do, I buy it (or at least I’m supposed to buy it) without saying, ‘I’ll pick this up another time.’

“As Samuel Johnson wrote, ‘To live in perpetual want of little things is a state, not indeed of torture, but of constant vexation.’ It’s no fun to be in a household that’s constantly running out of toilet paper.

“Over-buyers, of course, have the opposite problem. They spend too much time and money buying things that they don’t really need. ‘We can use that. This might come in handy. That would make a good gift…for someone.’

“For over-buyers, the resolution to ‘Buy needful things’ is also useful, because it reminds them to ask, ‘Do I really need this? Right now? Or do I just think I might need it?’

“To find out if you’re an under-buyer or an over-buyer, take this quiz.”

Hi – Sue here. I’m a “just right” buyer. I value my time, so I’ll buy multiple bottles of contact lens solution and other things I know I’ll use. As someone who doesn’t like to shop, my challenge is dragging someone to go clothes shopping with me to help me stay motivated. I’d love to hear how you did on the quiz and what buying challenges you face.

I’m looking forward to hearing from you,

Signature_Sue